I am having a complicated feelings now

Feel happy and sad

Finally my friend got her visa

She is going to have her new life in Australia with her boyfriend

I knew that long distance relationship is killing her 

I am happy for her

But sad that she is going to leave me soon

She is one of my close friend 

Besides that I am envy of her too

Anyway, I will always be here for her

I feel good today

Feel so thankful

Thanks for all the people in my life

No matter good or bad 

They make me more stronger and stronger

I was learning how to let go

Don't care too much

My boss started to like me 

I have faith that we can get along

Luckily I never give up

Whatever it is today I am in the mood 

I will keep up tomorrow

Practice my french with a guest from the 

Embassy of french

It is so good to have someone to speak other language

I love my life

Lately I saw a lots of people is enjoying life with their partner

It was so good to have someone to share your life with

I am still alone

Hard to tell

It was so hard to express my feelings to others
Every time when I try I must end up by saying
"Forget about it, It's not that important"

Why?
I have no idea
I was searching for a soul mate but I guess I can't
I am trying to put a mask on
But a clown mask and told myself that everything is gonna be fine

My heart is lonely

He was saying that I am too stress

I need to go for a short trip during Raya

I wish I could

I wish I could just walk away like that

But I can't 

He said I am lonely

I told him I am not

I got friends and families

Then he said

"Your heart is lonely"

He told me to find a good listener

Make myself happy go lucky

I told him I am

All my friends saw me they said I male them happy

He answer 

"They happy but not you"

How come he know me

He said not everyone can read my mind

But he can

I don't know why

I told him everything is gonna be okay

I will be fine

He said not everyday is a sunny day

How come you said you are fine

I know he is trying to help me

Trying to be there for me

But sorry that I have to push him away

I prefer to stand by my own

Trust me 

I am gonna be okay